An old man once gave me the most valuable piece of advice I’ve ever heard. It stuck with me for the rest of my life. He said to me, “Things don’t happen to you, they happen for you.” These words completely changed my perspective on life. Why? Because it hurts. It hurts when you constantly ask yourself, “What the hell am I doing with my life?” or “When will things change?” or “Why me?” It hurts when you feel like a failure. And it definitely hurts when it feels like nothing is ever changing; when in reality, EVERYTHING is ALWAYS changing.

According to a survey done by the Grand Rapids Counseling Services, 85% of people worldwide, adults and adolescents, have low self-esteem. That means that most people are insecure. And the question of whether or not we’re all on the right track in life is constantly on our minds. We’ve all been through them: tough moments that are filled with anxiety and self doubt. But what’s even more amazing about a struggle, is the ability to overcome it. As they say, the struggle you’re in today is developing the strength you need for tomorrow. Every thing has its time and place, including strife. But what’s most important, however, is how you handle it.

As someone who has overcome virtually everything: from the passing away of my mother; to my immigration and assimilation into the United States; and even my dropping out of college due to unforeseen medical circumstances which led to homelessness, I can truthfully say that there are certain circumstances that life WILL throw at you, but you have to be ready to overcome them and pass them like…well simply, an exam. You must pace yourself, question yourself, and really have faith, certainty in the uncertain, that what you believe is true. You must KNOW that you are on the right track. Otherwise, you will continue to be in a loop-hole of self-doubt and anxiety – the perfect parallel to the Christian’s version of hell. So, to help you avoid all that angst, I’ve typed up 5 signs to know you’re on the right track. Check them out below.

Sign 1: Things are Getting Tough

This might seem paradoxical, but believe me when I say that the best way to know that you’re on the right track is by observing your circumstances and detecting whether there is struggle. It’s true what they say, struggle builds character! If you are too complacent in life, this is a sign that you are avoiding and/or aren’t actively acting on the deeper issues at the core of your life’s problems. When the going gets tough, the tough get going. Think about that. When things get tough in life, only the strong survive. This isn’t a subjective perspective, it’s science. Survival of the fittest is real. And the best way to get fit is to exercise/practice. When life throws things at you, it’s important to realize that these are all opportunities for you to grow and blossom 🌸 Don’t look at setbacks and think, “Aw damn another one?!” Instead, embrace the change and channel charisma and a content spirit that has a growth mindset. When I first started acknowledging my “problems” as opportunities to practice/exercise growth; I was intimidated and unable to fully understand why I need to adapt this attitude. However, as the days go by, I’m reminded deeply and fully of how important it is to have a positive mindset that expects and even embraces challenges. By looking at the rough patches in my life as an opportunity for growth, I also tell the universe that I’m ready for ALL of the abundance it has to offer, and as a result great things come back to me because the universe loves rewarding effort.

Sign 2: Quality relationships are beginning to form, but solitude is also becoming your best friend.

One thing that’s extremely important for not only tracking your progress in life, but for your mental health as well, is having solid friends around you. I cannot emphasize this enough. Every time I’ve gone through some of the lowest moments of my life, I’ve had a strong circle to surround me. Of course, I’ve had situations that I had to fight alone. Trust me, I’ve had my fairrrr share of those. However, I’m learning that life isn’t meant to be lived alone. We are supposed to be in unison and support each other. There’s nothing like having a strong foundation of people you know and trust through anything. People naturally gravitate towards positive and happy people. The happier you are, the more people will want to associate with you. It’s a proven fact. So a great way to detect whether you’re the problem or not is by examining your circle. Show me your friends and I’ll tell you who you are. What do your friends say about you? Are your friends pessimistic and illogical? Do they argue about everything without any merit at all? Or are the compassionate and kind, always lending you an ear and always ready to help out however and whenever they can? If you don’t have the latter, it’s time to take a deep delve into what you might be doing to attract solely negative energy. It often takes digging deeper and looking inward to really find yourself. And I’m not going to lie, you might not always like what you see. However, self analysis is crucial for setting yourself apart. It shows that you’re mature enough to handle things objectively, even when the lines become blurred and subjective. Observing your friend group is vital, but so is spending time ALONE. And I mean truly alone. What do you do when nobody is watching? When there’s no Netflix nor chilling with anyone? What do you do when it’s just you? Are you all of a sudden blue? If the answer to that is yes, then I recommend doing some soul work such as meditation every day in order to ground yourself and figure out the root of why you can’t stand to be alone. I used to be afraid of solitude, so it’s taken a lot of hard work and dedication to find myself outside of others. As an extroverted introvert, I often gain a lot of energy just interacting with people. But I’ve learned that I must be able to source that energy from within myself, too. Boundaries and better forms of communication are born after deep contemplation. It’s important to take the time necessary to reflect daily on who you are, who you were, and who you want to be in order to really find yourself. This allows you to not only be wiser and calmer in life, but it also opens gates to channeling other realms that go far beyond the conscious one. I know this from experience. That being said, having great friends is important, but turning inward is equally as vital.

Sign #3: You have a powerful, unstoppable passion and drive to succeed. You see success everywhere you look.

Passion is a strong and barely controllable emotion. It’s desire, love and obsession all at once. Passion and drive together are a deadly force. With both, you can achieve virtually anything because on one hand you want to achieve it, and on the other you have the determination and will to achieve it. When you have a drive to succeed, you live, eat and breathe practices that make you better everyday. These include going to the gym when you really don’t feel like it, eating healthy when nobody is watching, or even waking up early and having a productive morning despite your snooze button looking real appealing. One way to know that you’re on the right track, even when you don’t feel like it, is by analyzing your will to succeed. How excited are you to wake up every morning? How motivated are you to work on your goals? How badly do you want to succeed? And furthermore, what does success look like to you? These are great questions to start pinpointing where you are presently, while still mentally building the blocks of where and who you want to be in the future. Another portion of this is seeing success everywhere you look. This doesn’t mean that your favorite luxury car is going to pop up everywhere you look (unless you manifest that). It means that you see yourself and everything around you as excellence. This goes back to the point in conversation about the company you keep. If your company doesn’t emulate behaviors that are conducive to your growth, you’re only causing yourself havoc because as discussed in the last blog post, “You can’t catch what you can’t see.” This means that you cannot identify with or imitate behaviors that you cannot see. You can’t hang around people who are the opposite of who you envision yourself being, and expect to achieve the same results. Similarly, you cannot look in the mirror and be unhappy with yourself, and expect the world to be happy with you. It’s simple math. That being said, if you have a burning desire to succeed in life, and are willing to take risks that elevate your chances of success, congratulations! You’re on the right path.

Sign #4: You care less about what other people think.

This is perhaps one of the most important tips I could leave you with today. I know what it’s like to feel like the odd-one-out, the cast away. I know what it feels like to want to fit in and be a part of the in group. However, believe me when I say your individuality is your biggest asset. Nobody can take that away you from you. Someone could copy your swag, your lingo, your attitude, the way you walk, the way you talk, but they can never actually be you. That’s something worth rejoicing and celebrating. The fact that you are so unique that nobody could ever be a full copy of you. When you walk around with that type of mind frame – that you are a boss King/Queen who cannot be duplicated or replicated, you realize that nobody’s opinion really…matters. At the end of the day, people are always going to have something to say. But as long as you continue to slay, hunny, it’s totally okay! Walk with pride and dignity knowing that your thoughts and actions are your own. Ravish in delight when you think about the fact that you are boundless and a piece of this everlasting universe. Words aren’t sticks nor stones, they can’t hurt your bones. So stop caring too much about what other people have to think or say, and concern yourself more with making a better version of yourself each and every day.

5. You’re at peace.

This one is simple. Peace is bliss. Nothing beats being able to sit alone in silence and think, “All is well.” The more at peace you are with yourself, the more at peace you are with others. That is nature. One way to know that you’re moving in the right direction is by observing how content you are with your life. Are you feeling stress/anxious? If so, why? Are you content with how things are? What would you change about the way things are? These are just a few questions to touch base with yourself when it comes to finding inner peace. Inner peace isn’t something you can buy at the store. You must work hard to find it because life isn’t a breeze. There’s so much corruption and deception that takes place on a daily basis, but the best thing anyone can do is to remain at peace and know that all will be well. I said this in a previous blog post but I’ll say it again: the bad news is that nothing is permanent, but the good news is that nothing is permanent. Everything comes to pass. And whether you look at the glass half full or half empty plays a huge role in how you perceive life and everything around you. So, be at peace. Don’t let the life stressors get to you; but if you do, remember that this too shall pass. It’s important to know that you are powerful beyond measure. That anything you will is in your power. Literally anything. You can manifest the life of your dreams. It just takes a little bit of patience and peace.

Well, that’s all from me today, my Royal Family. I love y’all and I hope these tips help you detect whether or not you’re on the right track. With nothing but love,

Rahaka.